Washington DC Opens The Mall For Dave E

Kaysville resident Dave E. made it very clear to Barack O. that the government shut down was in direct conflict with his upcoming vacation with daughter, Hailey. Appropriately, Dave E., a man not apt to put up with limitations, exerted his extraordinary mind powers towards Washington DC and demanded that the barriers come down. And this is how The Mall opened just hours before Dave and Hailey's arrival.
 The two most important people in America were able to enjoy a few days in our nation's capital without disappointment. Hailey savored the National History Museum most, while Dave's interests tended toward the art of some guy named Van-go. They both walked and biked to all the pertinent sites and only had to push down a few barriers/fences out of sheer rebellion.
 

Inadvertant Punishment

When I go school shopping for Tanner I mainly guess on the sizes because he doesn't come with me to the stores. Taking Tanner shopping with me would be like releasing a Tazmanian Devil into polite society. There would be trouble and ain't nobody got time for that! Instead I bring clothes and shoes home and we try them on in a controlled environment where he can be himself (*see characteristics of Tasmanian Devil). The other day I tried some new boots on Tanner, tied them nice and tight and then forgot about it. The next morning when I got him up for school, I pulled off his blanket and there were his feet, firmly encased in his knew clunky boots. My poor little cub slept with his shoes on and probably didn't even know it.

*interesting factoid from Wikipedia*
A TAZMANIAN DEVIL is characterized by its stocky build, pungent odor, extremely loud and disturbing speech, keen sense of smell and ferocity when feeding.It has an exceedingly strong bite for it's size. A Tazmanian devil can eat up to 40% of it's own weight in 30 minutes.SEE ALSO: Tanner E.

Need A Towel??

Bath time at the Erickson's is like going to an indoor water park except at a much, much smaller scale. After a soap scrub down Tanner is allowed to play with the "big cup". A bath without the "big cup" is like eating a meal without flavor or like taking a walk in the dark. Bathing is joyless unless a mess can be made. No big cup means No big splash. So I drape the entire bathroom with towels and let the boy have a little "pool time".

                                                video below:

The Sound Of Joy

 One of Tanner's classic characteristics is that he is considered "non-verbal". I find that word to be hilariously ironic since he has the loudest and most expressive "voice" I've ever heard! As many of you well know, Tanner is very verbal but cannot speak. He has different sounds depending on his moods. My favorite vocalization from him is a sound he makes when he is content and happy. The sound itself is discordant enough to drive a bystander insane, I mean literally INSANE! But since I associate this particular pitch with a boy who is comfortable and at ease I have grown to welcome it. I use his "ahhhhhhhhhh"..breath..."ahhhhhhhh"... breath...."ahhhhhhh" to gauge his whereabouts. When the sound stops then I know he is bored and on the move. Boredom is bad, "ahhhhhh" is good.

The Doom Of His Room

I remember fixing up Tanner's room not so long ago. I wanted it to be less like a junkyard and more like a bedroom. His mattress and box spring had been flattened into a misshapen mass due to the laws of gravity, ie. a 120 lb body jumping up will come down with the force of a pile driver. The sheet rock walls had been wounded so many times that they were rippling with patches. So in a hopeful state of mind I resolved to make Tanner's room "cute". The new headboard I got for him quickly became checkered with dents and divets. The ruination continued as his new TV stand was defaced with scratches and it's drawers flung about following Tanner's ritualized destruction pattern. Next came the demise of the new mattress set which slowly became an unrecognizable lump. One night I looked in on Tanner and noticed that his bed was more concave than ever. Perplexed, I removed the entire mattress and saw that he had completely splintered the bottom of his new bed.

 So now the only furniture in Tanner's room is an indestructible metal folding chair, and a cheap TV. Not so cute now!

A Church Parking Lot On Every Corner

Church parking lots not only provide acres and acres of parking spaces for minivans and suburbans on Sunday mornings but they also are an ideal place to take a 14 yr old driving when church is over. There is nothing but open asphalt and yellow lines, a wasteland of safety.

video below

Our Home Gym

Tanner has invented a new way to keep fit while at home. His routine is a little unusual but has proven to be very effective for him. He has lost two of his four belly rolls this summer and is looking like a contender. His cardio routine involves constant "back & forth" motion, slapping the wall or counter top in between reps. He also manages to fit in a few vertical jumps for muscle conditioning. Then for his abdomen work-out he has found "the couch" method very dynamic (if not destructive). To enhance his regimen he listens to the "Angry Birds" soundtrack which is very motivating (if not maniacal).

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