The Great Escape

In seafaring language it is called a "tall ship". Among the
prestigious it is called a "sailing yacht". I just call it a
great escape.

When: mid-March
Where: Caribbean
Occasion: 20 long and glorious years of marriage

Key Words: Teak-lined decks, Towering white sails, Azure seas,
-------------Sugary beaches, Gourmet dining, Tranquility

Just The Beginning....

I remember the good ol' days when Tanner's cute little head left
indentations in the sheet rock. I remember when Tanner's perfect
little noggin put concavities in the car door. I even recall the tender
bruises Tanner gave me on my shoulder when he was frustrated
with me. Those are all such yielding and delicate objects.

But now since Tanner is bigger and stronger he is choosing less
pliable objects to hit his head against. Damage to microwave: $300
Damage to Tanner: Nada

There's Nothing Like a Hot Bath

There's nothing like a hot bath on a cold night. Better yet there's
nothing like the glow of candlelight, soft music, a good book and
some well deserved privacy to go with the hot bath. The problem
lies when Tanner hears the "tick", "tick", "tick " of the hot water
coursing through the pipes and then he knows what's happening.
He likes a hot bath also.
As I relish my precious alone time, I hear the sound of a hard
head hitting a solid wood door. That would be Tanner "telling"
me in no uncertain terms that he wants in. Therefore I can enjoy
my bath with unrelenting, maniacal screaming on the other side
of the door or I can give up my bath....Is there really a choice?

'Tis The Season To Not Say What You're Thinkin'

For twenty-odd years I've never had a natural hair color. I've
never had the "whole wheat honey-blond ponytail tucked under
the organic cotton blend Patagonia cap. (Dave's dream girl). And
yet, for twenty-odd years Dave has never even had hair; you
know, like the golden, curly, wind-blown surfer locks on
Christopher Atkins in the movie "Blue Lagoon" (my dream boy)
Well, around Christmastime I made a slight change in hair color...
By now Dave should have realized that I'm a person of conviction.
I don't have a lot of in between attitudes. I'm all in, or I'm all out.
I'm passionate, or I'm indifferent. I'm honest or I'm silent. I'm
black or I'm white. Most of all I don't seek approval.

So when Dave woke up with a brunette one morning he asked me,
"Why can't you just have normal hair?"

Well guess what he got for Christmas! I'll grow my hair out as
soon as he does.

It's Shiny!

There has been some interest in Dave's colonoscopy outcome:
May I be the first to commend him on his robust and capable
colon. May it continue to be stalwart and serve him well into the
future.


Dave, you are so full of... life!

Metamorphosis of the Balsam Fir

It's not just a Christmas tree it's a work of art, a labor of love,
a feat of patience.

This is how we do it:
--the weekend after Thanksgiving Hailey and Dave go to the
same place and pick out the same kind of tree as the year before.
--Hailey and Dave can't agree on the same tree but one is
finally purchased after much gnashing of teeth
--Dave gets buyer's remorse as soon as he drives off with the
new tree. "I think I liked that other one better".
--Dave drives around the block 3 times debating whether
or not he should take the tree back and exchange it.
--He finally drives home with the original tree but is
mentally exhausted.





Then I take over while Dave rests

--For four hours I wrap the newly acquired tree with 12 strands
of tiny white lights.
--Each branch has lights securely fastened with wire.
--I don't like doing this; it's painful and monotonous.
--But when the lights are finished I LOVE putting on the
ornaments!
BEHOLD THE TRANSFORMATION!

Super Wind 2011

Davis County Experiences Hurricane Force Winds

High wind advisories were issued at least 24 hrs in advance for
Davis and Weber counties. The radio warned us. The TV warned
us. The lighted highway signs warned us. The weather service
predicted winds to be the strongest seen in thirty years.
After a gusty night I went outside to check the damage:

My BROOM blew over!!!

AND the lawn chair was toppled!!!


It seems that we live in a "safe-bubble". It wasn't until I turned
on the news that I became aware of the 10 semi trucks blown over
on the highway, the billboards strewn about like cardboard and
the hundreds of fifty year old spruce trees toppled onto streets and
houses. Then I heard that schools were closed, power lines were
down and roads were blocked with debris and tree limbs. Bountiful
and Centerville had gone dark.
As Dave helped cut up the giant spruce that had fallen across the
road at his parents house, he said the only sounds to be heard were
the whines of chainsaws and the howl of the wind.