Mommy -Daughter Outing to the Library

So Hailey asked me the million dollar question this week: "You know that one Simpsons episode where those swimmy things with Homer's head on them go towards Marge's egg? What does that mean??
I immediately called Dave and told him "It is Time!!, I'm taking Hailey to the library for "THE TALK"".

Hailey and I chose a nice, cozy and deserted corner in the library and pulled out the most excellent coming of age book "WHERE DID I COME FROM?" If people wandered too close to us Hailey would frantically whisper "put the book down, mom, I don't want them to see." We only had to move to a different corner three times!!!

All in all, it was a real eye opener for the poor girl, and I mean a wide eye opener. But now Hailey and I have a special bond...we both know how it works.

It's Daddy Daughter Season!

Hailey has turned True Blue

Cosmo the BYU mascot

Hailey got autographs from Cosmo and a few other players

Every fall Hailey gets to go to the home BYU games with her dad. It's eight hours of quality time with the "world biggest sucker"-dad. Not only do they watch a bit of the game but dad takes Hailey to the BYU Bookshop every time for a special treat. Dad buys her favorite candy (red hot devils), and another chosen item like a stuffed animal or a t-shirt or a toy. Not only does Hailey get treats and gifts, she also gets to eat a bunch of junk food. At the end of the game, dad hangs around waiting for an autograph or two.
What a great dad!

Conservative Suicide Hotline...How Can I Help You?

Conservative Suicide Hotline: Hello, how can I help you?

Dave: Give me a reason to live, just one reason!!!

Hotline: Remember sir, you can always hope for change.

Dave: You want change?, I'll give you change !! I'm now an out of work alcoholic and I'll never have to pay taxes again. How do like them apples Obama???

Hotline: That's right sir!! You're better off now that government can take care of you. Think about it...you don't have to work if you don't want to, in fact, the only thing you'll need to do is walk to the mailbox for your welfare check.

Dave: I feel better already... pass the bottle!

Halloween--- A Wonderful Holiday For Children

Straight from China

A yard full of ghouls

A delightful spider for the little children

The doorstep of horror!

And lastly, a little cannibal sitting in the front yard

I never liked Halloween much but Dave loves it!! He went all out in his decorations this year. I think there is a little competition going on between 3 of our neighbors. Across the street, The Elliotts have live spooky organ music and an elaborate display in their front room. Down the road, The Wilsons light up their place like a haunted house and have a robot butler giving out treats. Then there's The Ericksons (us) who hang monsters from the rafters and have skeletons all over the front yard with orange and purple lights on the trees.

This Halloween:
----we had 243 kids come to the door
----we gave out 12 lbs of candy (not including the 2 lbs I ate) !
----7 little children were too afraid to come to the doorstep
----2 little children were crying because they were scared of the monster

Best Halloween Costume---- a beat up boy scout
Lamest Halloween Costume----2 teenage girls dressed as two teenage girls

What a strange holiday!!